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The Reality of Resilience
The term resilience floods our news and social media feeds in the forms of memes, reels or inspirational quotes. Although many of these really lack weighting on just how difficult and painful the process of building it really is. They also fail to highlight how the levels of resilience rise and fall like the inhale…
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Are You Addicted To Your Past?
The past isn’t just those distant, worrisome memories that you harbour. It’s the emotions that evoke the very thought of a memory that you hold onto so tightly. We can all relate to this in so many ways with fond and not so fond memories. Have you noticed yourself also recalling a memory in response…
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Healing Is Experiencing The Truth
Healing of any description is difficult, painful and almost always comes with no clear expiry date. Some people prefer to view it from its alternative lens of “suffering”. Not one human being gets to escape this within their lifetime. It’s essentially our rite of passage from one life chapter to another, from one transition to…
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What Does It Mean To Be Authentic?
I ask myself this question quite a lot and I generally get different answers more often than not. But the one phrase that consistently sticks in my mind is “speak your truth”. We’ve all been (or are in) a situation where we are saying “yes” but we really mean “no”. We are compelled to say…
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You Are Valuable & Worthy
Too often we wrap our sense of value and worth up in our identity, occupation, the new car, the house, the followers etc. We rely so much on the external world to validate our words, actions and being. We do of course have to feel like we “belong” and hence why our close relationships are…
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Navigating Life’s Obstacles (Lemons & Waves)
Our life is an obstacle course, one we don’t get the option to choose. Some parts are easier and smoother than others. Along the way, you may stumble on rubble left there from someone else and at times we find treasure along this journey although it’s not always that obvious at first. If like me,…
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Key Reflections From Studying Personal Development
Last October, I began an online evening course focused on the areas of Counselling and Psychology with the bulk of content focused on Personal Development. Interestingly I’ve always struggled to get a clean, crisp definition for Personal Development because it’s such a broad topic although more importantly, it can mean different things to different people.…
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Stay The Victim Or Transform? You Decide…
Suffering avoids no one in this life. At some stage it comes for us all in various forms of severity. In this way, we are challenged either physically, emotionally and/or spiritually. I’m sure we’ve all asked ourselves “how am I going to cope” or “how am I going to get through this” however if you…
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You Are Enough
When you live in a state of feeling less than and constant comparison, you are robbing yourself of your own life experience. Don’t get me wrong, this is not an easy thing to stop doing especially as our society forces us to live in a comparative environment of striving to be the top student, top…
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The Power Of Your Intention
An intention is quite commonly known as a determination to act in a certain way or to produce an intended goal or objective. There is an expectation of a certain action to come about. So when applying this to yourself, your intention is really just how you want to think, feel or act in a…
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Rejection Is Redirection
Rejection in any form is painful and we’ve all experienced it at some stage in our lives. We learn this early on in childhood in the playground, being left out of a game/toy or through the dismissal of a caregiver in stress. While many of us experience rejection throughout our lives, it is never easy…
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Perfectionism: Life’s Toxic Trap
If you are like me, you grew up in the generation of millennials and not far behind Gen X, where neoliberalism was in full swing forcing us to be more competitive with our neighbours and become more and more individualistic. An era of drawing inside the lines within your copy book with perfect joint writing,…
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The Advantage Of Adversity
For most of your life, you’ve assumed most things follow a linear or straight forward order. The steps of the stairs, counting to ten, the alphabet and even the aisles in a supermarket. All this arrangement of structure within our day-to-day lives, fools you into thinking that your life follows a structured order. We use…
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The Fear Of Letting Go
We can all relate to the feeling of worry and anxiety taking hold over our chest or stomach as a result of a situation that has happened in the past and/or may happen in the future. These thoughts go around and around your mind as the emotions grip tighter and tighter around your lungs, sometimes…
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The Balancing Act Called Living
Life is one big balancing act of the good, bad and indifferent. No one is happy all the time and no one can be sad all of the time. It is somewhere in the middle where things all balance out over the span of time. I am not saying you don’t have pockets or periods…
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Mental Health & Wellbeing: The What, The Why And The How
I’m sure we are all very familiar with the ever growing narrative around “mental health and wellbeing”. Thankfully it is becoming more and more normalised in most countries. This concept is gaining traction of importance relative to other health modalities and while this topic has been close to my heart for many years, I found…
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Don’t Bother With New Year’s Resolutions
I find the whole concept of New Year’s Resolutions pretty loaded and triggering. One filled with all forms of impending guilt, fear and self-sabotage. I am sure we all immediately think of the typical changes people want to make to their weight, smoking, giving up alcohol etc. The pressure that people put on themselves to…
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Blame Your Boundaries
Like with a physical boundary such as a wall, fence, or door etc, your personal boundary can act as your protector between yourself and the rest of the world. We all have the capability to create these for ourselves although quite often maintaining them is the real test. Our boundaries can be tested, bent or…
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The Necessity Of Making Mistakes
Absolutely no one in this world has never not made a mistake. It is impossible. The very act of learning how to walk as a child requires it. Have you ever watched a toddler fall on their back side and immediately get back up. The vast majority of them just get back up with a…
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How To Find What You Are Looking For
This week I am writing to you from the Canary Islands and I was inspired by a beautiful, small bird roaming around the garden looking for food. I noticed that it kept coming back to the same patches of the ground. It did this for sometime and then eventually flew off. It got me thinking…
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Fill Your Own Cup First: No It’s Not Selfish
I lived in London for a number of years with a dear friend who became my housemate. One of our ongoing jokes (even to this day) was my inability to gauge the right amount of water needed for 2 full cups of tea. With my sustainable hat on, I was trying to save water and…
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What Is Your Value System?
Values are values, they are neither right or wrong. These are not to be confused with your basic human needs of food, shelter, safety and warmth. Values are your building blocks of beliefs that signpost what is important to you in your life and how you live your life. Values are the moral principles and…
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Not Everyone Is Going To Like You (And That’s Ok)
Why We Like To Be Liked Will Storr talks about life being “a status game” and how we humans must play it everyday of our lives. There are all sorts of different games where you are striving for the reward of status for being valuable e.g. the person good at football, or singing or the…
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Gratitude Can Be Your Superpower (If You Let It)
I know you have likely heard it all before and the frustrating advice from friends and family on being “grateful” for something. Quite often this message can be infuriating especially when you are trying to deal with a difficult situation. With that said, expressing gratitude (in many forms) is much more powerful than you think.…
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Why Fear Is Your Best Teacher
What Is Fear? A distressing emotion aroused by impending danger, evil, pain, etc., whether the threat is real or imagined; the feeling or condition of being afraid. Dictionary.com You can see from the above definition, just how broad the context of fear really is and how it can manifest in your life. Fear can take…
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Loving Yourself: Why You Should Prioritise This Over Everything
Sounds selfish right? What if I said to you that self-hate is a coping mechanism. One to enable you to avoid facing pain by providing yourself with an internal dialogue of criticism and shaming different aspects of yourself. In this way, you can control the hurt that you inflict on yourself and more importantly its…
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Your Mind Is More Powerful Than You Think
It is hard to imagine your mind without any thoughts, right? It is your constant, internal dialogue that you have with yourself. What to eat, what to wear, what to say and what to do. Would it shock you if I told you that you can have anywhere between 60,000-80,000 thoughts per day? This is…
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You Are Not Your Emotions
It took me a long time to realise that I am not my emotions and that it is perfectly ok to feel whatever emotions that arise at any moment. I also felt that it was “bad” to feel any sort of so-called negative emotions e.g. anger, sadness, fear and that the ultimate desired state was…
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6 Steps To Stop Self-Sabotaging Yourself
Self-sabotage: to behave, especially habitually or compulsively, in a way that interferes directly with one’s own goals, well-being, relationships, etc. http://www.dictionary.com How Has It Manifested For Me? I’ll caveat that this is not an exhaustive list of self-sabotaging behaviours and just some of the experiences that I have personally dealt with regarding my own self-sabotage.…
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Managing Uncertainty
Absolutely nothing is certain in life but yet we live our lives wrapped in a soft fluffy cloud of what we perceive as certainty, like going to school/work/bed on repeat and this routine gives us a great sense of comfort. Humans by our very nature struggle to cope with uncertainty and so we create these…
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Life Coaching: Why Everybody Should Give It A Go
I often get asked what the difference between a life coach and a therapist is. Typically my answer will include something like “ a therapist helps you process your past and a life coach empowers you to develop your future”. Life Coaching: the activity of helping clients decide what they want in their lives and…
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The Power Of Forgiveness
Forgive (verb): to stop feeling angry with somebody who has done something to harm, annoy or upset you; to stop feeling angry with yourself. Source: Oxford Learners Dictionaries When I first read this definition, frankly I was surprised and also struck by the word stop, in how limiting and unrealistic this choice of verb is…
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Your Past Holds The Key To Your Future
Whether we like it or not, our past has shaped our current reality and will continue into the future unless you do something about it. All the triggers, habits, ticks and subsequent behaviours can be all traced back to your early life. Everything we have experienced in our lives; good, bad or indifferent will remain…
Be Only You
Inspiration for your personal growth journey!
Be Only You 